Stop putting your clients first & watch your business (and you) thrive!

How many times have you heard the phrase: “Put the client first”.

But when we learn about self-care, we say “put yourself first”.

So why is business and personal care NOT the same?


If you’ve been in your holistic/spiritual business for any amount of time, you know that there is BARELY any separation between your business and your personal life.

So why the hell, do we put us first in our personal lives but the client first in our business?


Remember –  YOU ARE THE BUSINESS.  Without YOU there would be no business for your clients.

You are the greatest asset to your business so I say: PUT YOURSELF FIRST.

Fuck the client!

Put yourself first.
Fuck the client!

And this isn’t about self-care.  I mean PUT YOURSELF FIRST in your business:

  • In the way you structure your work hours and business organisation

  • In the way you show up in your business

  • (and) ESPECIALLY in the way you CREATE your offers.


When we can envision for ourselves what it is that we want to create, without thinking about the client, we allow our SOUL to guide us.

Which ultimately leads to more satisfaction, longevity and fun, in our business, because we 100% LOVE what we have created.

When we can envision for ourselves what it is that we want to create, without thinking about the client, we allow our SOUL to guide us.

When we start working from thinking about our client first and THEN creating… we create from the mind.

This can be good to start with, then bloody FRUSTRATING, especially if you have any inkling that you may, in fact, be made up of limitless potential (which I guess is everyone reading this blog!).

This way of THE CLIENT FIRST is the OLD MASCULINE PARADIGM of doing business:

  • It asks us to sacrifice our self-fulfilment to serve others

  • It asks us to put the needs and desires of others first

  • It asks us to move out of integrity of what our SOUL wants to create, to satisfy others.

And this is DOUBLE WHAMMY BAD for women, because we have been entrained to learn that others’ needs come before our own.


And underlying this strategy, I sense  a whole truck load of fear:

It says “I can’t actually create what I want, because people won’t like it or there is no market for it”

Ie.  “I am not a limitless being who can create what I want to create in the world”


“I am a limited being, who can only create what I want, within boundaries”

It says “I need to put my client’s needs first, otherwise I won’t have a service that people will want”

Ie. “I don’t believe what I create is worthwhile, so I need to make sure it is palatable, before I create it”

or “I believe what I create is not worthwhile as its own entity, so I need to make sure it fits in, before I put it out in the world”


What this all leads to is a soul-yearning for something more…

A deeply felt, dissatisfaction, made by the fight between, your soul’s desires and your mind’s logic.

The pushing, the hard work, the hustle…

A resentment towards your business…

Clients who are FAR from your dream ones…

Poor boundaries….


And more often than not – an internalised anger, self-doubt or self-loathing with no “apparent” cause.

So what is the remedy? Create first, from your Soul, then flesh out the details!


Create first, from your Soul,
then flesh out the details.


Now, you are ready to think about your client!

Once you’ve come from a soul-centred, place of creation, ask yourself these questions:

  • Is this something that feels like it needs to be shared? No (it’s a personal project). Or Yes – will it be monetised? Or free?

  • What clients would be attracted to what I have to offer?  What clients LOVE what I offer already?  What are their common language, needs and desires?

  • What boundaries do I need in place (putting me first) that feels like an equal exchange of energy (time, money, resources) for myself and my client?  And how do I communicate them?


So, of course, there is a time when your client comes into your business planning.

But, I don’t agree that that the client takes first place!

In fact, I don’t even agree with the idea of our spiritual businesses as being a vehicle of service- of servitude – to anyone.  I think it makes us feel safe and good about ourselves to reframe, ‘making money’ off of our gifts and talents to ‘serving’ people, but I don’t think it’s completely honest or accurate.

Yes, you give a service, but I would say more accurately that you HELP or GUIDE others with your skills.  But I certainly would not say it is SERVING them.  Especially if you are getting paid for it.


Straight from good old Google : The definition of serving is: 1. perform duties or services for (another person or an organization).

But the root of ‘Serve’ is: (from ) -serv- , root.

  1. -serv- comes from Latin, where it has the meaning “slave.” This meaning is found in such words as: deserve, disservice, servant, serve, service, servile, servitude, subservient)

Remember words have power…. serving, servitude…a new-age way  to say becoming a “slave” to your clients, but masking it behind surface-level good-feels and ‘humbleness’.

Remember words have power…. serving, servitude…a new-age way to say becoming a “slave” to your clients, but masking it behind surface-level good-feels and ‘humbleness’.


Just claim what you do.  Stop TRYING to be humble and just BE humble.  You can claim that you make money from your clients (in fact that is what a business should do, or it’s just a hobby) AND be humble about it.


I know, that you have created a business because you want to work in a meaningful way doing what makes your heart sing.


Stop trying to people please,

Stop blocking your soul’s desires,

Stop being out of integrity with yourself,

Stop putting your needs on the back burner,

Stop doubting that what you truly desire to offer,  IS wanted and needed, by YOUR people.


Create your Soul’s work and watch yourself thrive on ALL levels.



Nik Chung Authentic Branding & Visibility Coach
Dear Adventurer,
Please find some questions below to ponder or to journal, to further your exploration of this topic:
  • Where do you NOT put yourself first in your business? How does that make you feel?
  • What resistances or fears do you have to putting yourself first in ALL of your business?
  • How would it feel to put yourself first in your business?
  • What would need to change to make YOU numero uno in your business?
  • What has your soul been calling you to do and what stops you from creating it? What would your next steps be to make it happen?

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