Agreement 3: Don't Assume Anything (Don Miguels Work Applied to Leadership)

This is part four of a six part blog series of which I'm exploring Don Miguel Ruiz's famous work "The Four Agreements" of which he added one more in a later book "The Fifth Agreement".  If you would like a summary of all the agreements, have a read of this blog.

In this blog, I'm diving deeper into the third agreement and its application to Conscious Leadership: Don't Make Assumptions.

If you haven't already read about the first agreement or the second agreement, click on the links to read them first.

---

Some background first!

The four agreements (of which Don Miguel then added a fifth later on), are in Don's words "offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives to a new experience of freedom, true happiness, and love."  They are concerned mainly with the agreements that you make with yourself. 

Therefore each agreement takes you deeper into integrity with yourself, which is an essential attribute for any Conscious Leader who is genuinely interested in creating positive change in the world.

The third of the agreements, Don't Assume Anything, adds to the foundation laid out by Agreement Two: Don't Take Things Personally and sets you up for the next agreements:

Agreement Four: Always Do Your Best.

Agreement Five: Be Sceptical, But Learn To Listen.

So let's dive in.

---

#3 Don't Make Assumptions

Assumptions are ideas or beliefs that we hold that are not based on fact. They're stories that we have created based on our observation of the world, that is highly biased because of the personal lens that we view the world through (that lens is made up of our past experiences, beliefs, thoughts etc - it's extremely personal).

Assumptions are essentially stories, that have no real evidence behind them.

So Don Miguel's third agreement may seem self-explanatory - because it is! Don't make assumptions about the world.

Many wars have been fought over assumptions. Seriously. What the world needs is more communication for clarity, not taking actions based on assumptions!

• Assumptions lead to misunderstandings.

• Misunderstandings lead to fractures (where there need not be fractures).

• Fractures lead to "me vs them" mentality.

• "Me vs them" leads to a "getting world" or selfishness.

• Selfishness what has created a world where we make decisions based on short-term, personal reward, rather than long-term collective benefit.

Many wars have been fought over assumptions. Don't assume anything!

Like agreement two (don't take anything personally), making assumptions is a personal experience:

Because the way that we interpret the world, is through our personal lens! And so the assumptions we make, will be filtered through our lens.

This can lead to assumptions, which may not be true.

And I'm not just talking about making an assumption about someone else or something external to you.

This is also an agreement to not make assumptions about yourself. Don Miguel Ruiz says "assumptions lead to {us}... jumping to conclusions".

Don Miguel Ruiz says "assumptions lead to {us}... jumping to conclusions".

We assume a lot about the world we know. About WHAT we know. We assume a lot about what we BELIEVE to be true about ourselves. We assume, that is, decide something is true without proof.

We assume, that is, decide something is true without proof.

And when our mind goes on an assumption joy ride, it goes wild! Moving from one assumption to the next - a snowball effect of "What If's" and "Probably Will Happen's" and "Must Mean That's".

Assuming takes your mind out of the present moment. It takes you into future thinking and it often leads you to catastrophising situations.

See the pitfall of making assumptions?

So...

• By not assuming anything, you can start to live more presently.

• By not assuming anything, you can stop catastrophising.

• By not assuming you can live with more calm and peace.

• By not assuming you start to see what is really true for the moment, without spinning a whole story about it, making it easier to deal with what is right in front of you, because you're not bogged down with emotions that are created from your mind's (unevidenced) assumptions.

---

When you stop assuming anything, you regain back your power and control over your world. 

When you stop assuming anything, you regain back your power and control over your world. 

What I mean by that is that the experience that you have of the world, is based on your lens on the world. How you experience one situation is not going to be exactly the way that someone else experiences it.  So when you stop assuming anything, you no longer have your thoughts, beliefs and therefore energy and action, being caught up in false assumptions, which means you now recuperate that creative energy.

So when you stop assuming anything, you no longer have your thoughts, beliefs and therefore energy and action, being caught up in false assumptions, which means you now recuperate that creative energy.

And this means that you can now direct that creative energy towards something you DO want to create. Not what you assume is available to you. Because in truth, everything is available to you!

Can you see the magic there as a Conscious Leader? What assumptions are you making about the level of influence you have or the level of change that you can create? Your assumptions are just that - falsehoods.

So stop acting within the boundaries of these false ideas, and instead start acting beyond the assumptions that have been making you play small.

Start acting beyond the assumptions that have been making you play small!

---

So for your own reflection here are a few questions for you to answer:

• In what ways and in what areas do I tend to assume things? With whom, in what situations and what conditions?
• How do I see my assumptions getting in the way of me being a more Conscious Leader?
• In regards to my vision to be a more Conscious Leader that creates a more positive workplace, what do I assume about my workplace and my ability to make this vision a reality?
• How do you think the application of this agreement in your leadership role would change your influence and impact?
• On a scale of 1-10 how important do you think this agreement is in developing yourself as a leader?
• What resources and support do you need to personally embody and practice this agreement?

Comment below with your answers! I'd love to hear what you have to say!

----

As was the intention of Don Miguel's work, these agreements first are to be applied to oneself, before applying to the outside world. I agree with this approach - I believe that to truly be in integrity, you must first be the embodiment of that which you want to create. This doesn't mean that you have to be perfect to start, it just means that you have to be doing the work, honestly. 

I don't believe that we ever get to the end of our spiritual and personal development, so instead of thinking perfection is the aim, think of your development as a journey of which you are fully committed to doing. Not only for yourself, but for the grand vision of changing this world for the better!

I don't believe that we ever get to the end of our spiritual and personal development, so instead of thinking perfection is the aim, think of your development as a journey of which you are fully committed to doing.

Once you've got a handle on agreement three it's time to work on agreement four which is Always Do Your Best.

Remember that each of these agreements are works in progress, with deepening layers as you become more adept and aware. So in your exploration and development, remember that you aren't going backwards if you find yourself working on the same agreement (again!).  You've just found another layer!

Here for your constant evolution,

Arohanui,

Nik Chung

Ps. I LOVE that you are a Conscious Leader! Want more personalised help to reach your leadership goals? Send me a private message on LinkedIn or email me on nicola@nikchung.com and let's chat!